Is It Weird to Marry your Dog?
Although the boundaries of traditional marriage have been substantially stretched in recent years, most people don’t see them stretching far enough to allow for the matrimonial union of canines and human being.
Hoax news stories have popped up in various parts of the country lately concerning dog-human marriage ceremonies, and fashion designer Karl Lagerfeld announced in an interview with CNN that he wished to marry his cat, but so far, no animal-human wedding has been deemed legal by the courts in the United States.
Surprisingly enough, fringe groups exist for the advocacy of marriage between man and his or her best friend. But how realistic is it? Certainly, there are many lonely people in the world who have found a great deal of emotional solace by sharing their lives with a canine companion, but does that really translate into marriage?
To answer the question posed in the title – “Is it Weird to Want to Marry Your Dog?” – the simple answer is a resounding “Yes.” However, hoaxes notwithstanding, there have been some documented cases of humans marrying dogs in various parts of the world.
Australian Man Marries Dog in Park
A 20-year-old Australian man named Joseph Guiso married his yellow Labrador Retriever, Honey, in a park ceremony in the community of Toowoomba. The vows included a loving avowal delivered by Guiso to his bride about how she had made his life perfect. Honey licked his face, and they became man and dog – er, man and bride.
Guiso, a deeply religious man, claims that the couple’s love is divinely inspired, and that a sexual component does not exist in their relationship. It’s been reported recently that the publicity is beginning to put a strain on the bride, so all is apparently not well in paradise.
Indian Man Marries Dog to Stop Evil Curse
In 2007, an Indian man married a 10-year-old female dog on the advice of his astrologer. Some years prior, he had stoned two dogs to death and hung their bodies from a tree. Shortly after he committed these horrific actions, his arms and legs became paralyzed and he lost the hearing in one of his ears.
He suffered for 15 years and believed that the dogs he had murdered had placed a curse on him. When he could stand it no longer, he sought the advice of an astrologer, who suggested that he marry a dog as a way to banish the curse. He married a dog named Selvi in 2007.
Nepalese Man Weds Dog in Local Custom
As unusual as it seems in our culture, there is a small community in the Kailali district in southeastern Nepal where local lore holds that old men who re-grow teeth must take a canine bride. Marrying a dog was supposed to bring the elderly gents luck. It certainly brought luck in this case – bad luck.
The bridegroom passed away three days after he and his four-legged bride walked down the aisle, leaving her a widow.
Although it’s highly doubtful that marriage between species will ever be legal in the United States, people sometimes stage mock-ceremonies in “fun” where they marry their pets, but these aren’t true romantic unions.
They’re basically just an excuse to have a party and act silly. The desire to have a spousal relationship with an animal, even a loyal and loving dog, is just flat-out weird.